To make the start of Black History Month we are delving into the topic of race and racism. This is something we talk about all year round at Dad Chats, but with this being Black History Month it is another great opportunity to talk about it.
We chatted all about educating our kids, and ourselves on diversity, race and racism. Including how we talk to our children about the topic, and got some suggestions for great resources for our kids. We heard about how education in schools and nurseries is still lacking on black history, and what we can do to help change that.
There are so many great resources across our site that talk about race and diversity.
Talking to our children about race issues can be difficult, but Last year, Nigel wrote a great blog called How To Talk To Children About #BlackLivesMatter. This is a great resource with helpful advice for talking to our kids about this important topic. We highly recommend you take a look.If you haven’t heard, we also have a fantastic Podcast which is hosted by Nigel, and every week he talks to a different guest about their parenting journey. We have some great guests who talk about racism in their stories. These are from John Lashley (Brooklyn Brownie Company), Elliott Rae, Amos Hurst and Nihal Arthanayake – check them out!
Topics:
1. Do you think you talk to your kids enough about diversity, race and racism? Or is it something you think you need to talk about more?
2. Do you feel that you are educated enough? Or do you think you need to learn more?
3. We want you to share any of your favourite resources for kids, or for parents!
Dad Chats Live: Talking about male cancer - do you look after yourself?
This week is Orchid Male Cancer Awareness week, so tackled this topic head-on. We know some men find it difficult to talk about male cancer. But this is another topic that is so important for us to talk about. Did you know that prostate cancer (98%) and testicular cancer (97%) have some of the highest survival rates after early diagnosis - so it's important we know the signs, check for them, and take action early.
In order to be the best parents we can be, we need to be looking after ourselves. Not just with the little things, but we need to know how to check ourselves for the early signs of cancer and how to get help with that. We discussed all of this with some really great members of our community who shared their own experiences.
We also have a great podcast episode from Amos Hurts and Sophia May that talks about male cancer. Amos was diagnosed with two forms of cancer, fought the caner and won. Now he is a healthy, 85 year old dad of 7! Head over to Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts to listen to his story.
1. Checking yourself for the signs and symptoms of Male cancer (and all other cancers) is important - are you aware of how to check yourself, and do you make an effort to check?
2. Is cancer something that worries you? Or is it something you don’t think or worry about?
3. For our lighthearted question, we all know how important it is to look after ourselves. We want to know your favourite way to keep healthy. (Do you get your 5 a day, drink 2 litres of water or go for a run every day? We want to know!)
Dad Chats Live: Talking about World Suicide Prevention day.
Mental health is something we are passionate about here at Dadvengers. So it was only right that we talk about World Suicide Prevention day. This is a topic that really hits home for a lot of our community, and we were so grateful to them for joining us for this important chat.
We delved into this emotional topic, and talked about the importance of raising awareness around suicide to break down stigmas. We also talked about how to reach out for help, and the impact losing a loved one to suicide can have on those left behind. The most valuable thing about this chat is the fact that we were joined by people who have had first hand experience of suicidal thoughts, and losing someone to suicide.
Both hours of these chats need to be seen, please also share them with family and friends - it is so important that we keep breaking down the barriers to getting people the support they need - hopefully these chats will help do that.
1. Do you think there is enough awareness and understanding surrounding suicide?
2. Have you had any experience dealing with someone who has had suicidal thoughts? How would you begin to support someone you love that may be suicidal?
3. Laughter can heal many things. So we want to know what’s the funniest parenting moment you’ve had in the last few months?
One of our Dadvengers community has written a blog post on the subject. It's entitled A Letter To a Dad Contemplating Suicide – You Are Loved More Than You Know. and the post delves into the emotional aftermath of losing a dad to suicide and it is written by someone who has experienced it themselves. Please read, let us know what you think, and share the post with the people in your lives.
Dad Chats Live - Equal Parental Leave. Today we were joined by Rob Simpson who works for @avivauk. Aviva have scrapped paternity leave, two weeks just aren't enough - Aviva recognised this and have an excellent new policy.
At Aviva all staff are entitled to equal parental leave when they have a child. This means that fathers can take up to 6 months paid leave and up to 12 months including unpaid leave. This is a game changer when becoming a parent and listening to Robs experience it’s easy to see why. Rob tells us why this policy was so important for him, his wife, and his new born baby - especially getting through those first few weeks of sleepless nights! He also tells us how supportive Aviva were when he used the policy, not only do they actively encourage their staff to make use of the policy. They also keep in touch with their staff while they're off. Rob's manager kept him up to date with things at work so he didn't have to worry about it!
This policy is an absolute game changer, and something we think is so important for dads to be offered. We would love to see more companies making a change to support equal parental leave.
Aviva have also written us a great blog post telling us all about their policy. It's entitled How Aviva Are Changing Paternity Leave For The Better. Anthony Fitzpatrick Head of colleague Experience and Employment Policy at Aviva tells us about the change to the entitlement, and Rob shared more of his experiences of using it.
This week on Dad Chats Live we have a special guest! Talking to us about the best days out with dad for summer 2021. Susie from Wiki Places For Kids joined us to chat about the best places to take the kids this summer. And we delve into why these are Susie's top choices.
Another brilliant guest, we loved having Susie join us, and can't wait for you to see this fun and informative chat!
1. We will be talking to Susie Lodge from @wikiplacesforkids_official about the best places to take kids for days out in the UK this summer.
2. Do you have any tips for other parents planning days out for the family? These could be money saving tips, time saving tips or just advice that you think all parents should know.
3. For our lighthearted topic, we want your personal recommendations on some of the best places you’ve been with your kids!
Susie has also written a brilliant blog post about these top days entitled 11 Great Places For Days Out With Dad Summer 2021. The post gives even more information about the best places to visit, as well as links to their websites so that you can find them easily!
Check the post out for details on great days out with dad summer 2021 including:
Mr Mulligans - The indoor virtual golfing experience that is great for golf lovers to introduce their kids to the sport!
Pixel Bunker - For dads who like to get involved in games with the kids – this is a must visit!
Lego Discovery Centre - An entirely indoor venue this the ultimate indoor Lego playground – and a great option for those rainy days where dads wants to take the kids!
Forestry England - Outdoor play with kids is so important for kids and dads alike, and these wonderful forests are fast becoming ultimate destinations. Make sure you take a look at Why Outdoor Play is Great for Your Health and Happiness. A post written by Helen Stroudley who also joined us for a Dad Chat.
Dad chats live: This week we talked about baby loss, grief and it’s affect on our mental health, with special guest Gary Anderson (@gary_secure_mind_solutions ). This is another subject that is so important to talk about, and we couldn't have done it without our special guest.
Gary talked openly about discovering his twin daughters had Twin To Twin Syndrome - a serious condition that can cause life threatening illness in unborn twins. He told us about their birth, and travelling 60 miles away from his wife with one of his twin daughters, Alana, to another hospital. Sadly Alana didn't survive. But there was no time to grieve, as they had another baby, Dana, to be strong for. When their second baby lost her life, Gary buried his grief.
He told us how he pushed his grief down for 14 years, not talking about it, taking risky jobs and not caring about putting his life in danger. Although this is a sad and difficult subject, Gary's story is also inspirational. Gary is still here today because he got some help and started talking about his daughters. This really is another unmissable chat.
Gary has also written a blog about his experience. There are more than 5000 deaths of babies and infants a year. in the UK, this is a subject that needs to be talked about.
Click here to read the blog post A Fathers Grief The Impact of Baby Loss.
Gary has also written a book about his daughters and his experience of loss and grief. The book is called Daddy and the Two Bears, and can be found here.
Dad Chats Live - as pride month comes to an end, we are joined by Kate from @lesbemums. We focused solely on the conversations this important month creates with our children.
We chatted about how to talk to our children about sexual identity and gender - and when the best time is to start that conversation. Then talked about how to create an environment that makes our children feel happy to share with us. And the best books, films and TV shows that teach our children about the LGBTQ+ community.
Kate shared some great tips into how her and her wife talk to their children about gender and sexual identity - and how different these conversations are to how it was talked about when she was a child. We talk about coming out - and why one day we hope that won't be something anyone feels they have to do.
1. How and when did you talk to your children about sexual identity and gender?
2. How can we, as parents, best support our children to feel empowered and confident to share their gender and/or sexual identity?
3. For our lighthearted topic, we want to know your favourite materials that teach children about the LGBTQ+ community (books, films, tv shows or anything else!)
If you want to hear more about parenting in the LGBTQ+ community, we have two great podcast episodes. One from Jamie Beaglehole (DaddyandDad) and one from Stu Oakley (@Somefamiliespod). Both of these episodes delve into life as LGBTQ+ parents, from two dads who are fantastic advocates in their community.
Dad Chats Live - Talking about Coping with Anxiety with Saleema Davies.
Saleema is a clinical hypnotherapist and founder of Papalona. A company that creates audio recordings to support children and parents’ mental health easily and effectively. We talk about the impact of anxiety on our lives, and how to cope with it. She shares some brilliant tips like:
Use Your Body - using breathing exercises to slow the breath and signal to our minds that the threat has passed, and moving to burn off the excess adrenalin that anxiety produces are simple but effective ways to help manage anxiety.
Acknowledge the Voice - we all have that voice in our minds that tells us what we're doing wrong - Saleema teaches us how coping with anxiety means managing that voice and we loved her advice on this!
In part two, we asked you about whether you are an anxious person, and how much your anxieties affect your every day life.
We also hear stories about a times you were anxious or nervous only to realise after the event there was no need.
Saleema has also written a fantastic blog post with even more information about coping with anxiety.
It's entitled How To Manage Your Anxiety, So That You Can Help Your Kids Manage Theirs. And is a great beginners resource to learn more about the things we can do every day to cope with our anxieties. We suggest you grab a drink, sit back and read Saleema's wisdom!
Huge thanks to Saleema for joining us - welcome to the Dadvenger Community!
Dad Chats Live - This week we talked with Elliott Rae from @mff about their new book DAD. A collection of 20 stories of fatherhood from 20 real dads who are living it every day. It’s a much needed book that will hopefully help to change the narrative for modern day fathers.
Elliott chatted to us about how the DAD book came about - the stories he heard from the different dads, and how he crowdfunded the project after it was turned down. We also talk about Elliott's experience of becoming a father, and how his daughter was unwell after her birth. This led Elliott to suffer PTSD, and he realised there wasn't enough support for dads to talk about their experiences.
Elliott then created MFF - Music, Football, Fatherhood, which started as a blog, and has grown into a support network for dads.
Another week with a brilliant Friday night chat!
This important book is groundbreaking. It is bringing together a group of men to speak openly about their challenges and successes in parenting. But getting it published wasn't easy. Elliott was turned down by different publishing houses. And in the end set about to raise the funds to self publish.
Read more about Elliott and what he had to do to make this book a reality in the post Everything You Need to Know About the ‘DAD’ Book
Plus Elliott also joined us on the Dadvengers Podcast where he talked about growing up in London with his parents who had emigrated from the Caribbean. You'll hear how his how his dad was a strict parent, but he was also fair and supportive! Elliott also opened up about the difficult birth of his daughter and first few months of his daughters life. From being in hospital to a life threatening allergic reaction at just a few months old. All this had a massive impact on Elliott’s parenting journey, and also led to his starting the Music Football Fatherhood.
