Dadvengers Podcast Episode 39 – David Lammy
It’s the Dadvengers Podcast episode 39 – David Lammy. This weeks’ guest is a father of 3, member of parliament and a champion for dad’s rights in the family. He grew up in London and represents the ward of Tottenham as a labour MP. He is also currently (12/23) the shadow secretary of state for foreign, commonwealth and developmental affairs. We’re so pleased to welcome the Rt. Hon. David Lammy to the podcast.
David grew up in London with his parents who had emigrated from the Caribbean. His father was a taxidermist who David describes as a charming friendly guy, but who was also hiding a problem with alcohol and could be unpredictable in his moods. David’s father left when he was around 11 years old, this had a huge impact on David’s life.
After becoming a father in his early 30’s, he realised there was a lack of support for people becoming parents – particularly young fathers who struggle to access help. This led David to create the All Party Parliamentary Group on Fatherhood, a political group looking to shape policy for fathers. Including the severely lacking paternal support. He also campaigns for the paternity system in the UK to get a major overhaul and be reflective of what men, and families actually need.
David also tells us about getting into therapy, the amazing support he gets from his psychotherapist, and raising his children with modern problems and worries, such as knife crime. This is a brilliant chat with an inspirational father who works hard to better shape the lives of other dads in the UK. We’re so grateful to David for joining us 💙
Use the player above to listen to Dadvengers Podcast Episode 39
Episode Time Stamps
1:42 – “He was a charming, friendly kind of guy… but he had a problem with alcohol”.
– David on his complicated relationship with his father.
5:51 – “He disappeared in my first year at secondary school…It was a big struggle for me”
– The impact of David’s father leaving the family.
12:55 – “I was fortunate, I had wonderful God Fathers… these were great, great guys.”
– The positive male role models who stepped up to support David.
15:22 – “I am now the father of three children, two older boys who are birth children and one adopted daughter.”
– David tells us about becoming a father.
21:12 – “There is a window where it is painful and you can get quite low and quite depressed!”
– The challenges of parenthood – particularly the sleep deprivation!
24:24 – “There are moments when you don’t want to add to the burden, and there are things around masculinity and fatherhood that you feel you want to share with another guy”
– Why having good support from other fathers is so important.
29:26 – “We just haven’t got the situation for fathers we should have… proper, paid, transferrable parental leave that extends for up to a year.”
– What David thinks paternity leave in the UK should look like.
36:37 – “I’ve got a psychotherapist because I can afford one… it is incredibly helpful”
– David on accessing therapy and how helpful it is for him.
43:20 – “We tend to watch films… That is the way we can have a conversation about the challenges of race.”
– How David relates and talks to his children about race.
49:08 – David’s Dad Superpower
Also on Dadvengers…
If you enjoyed this episode of the Dadvengers Podcast don’t forget to check out some of the others. We have dads from all sorts of backgrounds and industries talking about their journey’s through fatherhood. And more are being added all the time.
Whether you are male, female, and parent or a parenting professional there’s lots to be learned by listening to men tell their stories. We also have a comments box below if you’d like to leave your thoughts.
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Another awesome guest that will hopefully inspire others to keep on learning as we parent. There is no one size fits all formula to being a dad we all have to adapt to whatever life throws at us.
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