Dadvengers Podcast Episode 29 – Abdul Bangura
***Trigger Warning*** – This episode contains topics that may be triggering for some listeners. Namely birth trauma, grief, and custody battles.
If this impacts you, please find support in your area here.
It’s the Dadvengers Podcast Episode 29 – Abdul Bangura.
This week’s guest has built two successful businesses in his lifetime, the first he lost in the pandemic but the second is going strong! He is a proud single dad, and he is here to share his parenting experience with us! We’re so pleased to welcome Abdul Bangura to the podcast.
Abdul grew up in a supportive blended family. He always wanted to be a dad when the time was right. But when it happened at 29 – he wasn’t ready. Abdul’s own father stepped in and after a good chat with his dad, he stepped up.
His baby’s mum was the first pregnant woman in the UK to be diagnosed with Covid-19. She was taken into hospital and had an emergency caesarean but sadly didn’t survive. Abdul became a single dad overnight, but that journey also wasn’t easy. He had to go through the family court system to gain parental responsibility for his own child – something a mother would never have to go through. And he had to fight for custody of his daughter against her maternal family.
All of this stress, plus losing his business due to the pandemic, led Abdul to sink into depression. But, he sought help through therapy, turned his focus to being a dad and built himself a new business to provide for his daughter.
Abdul’s story is inspirational. He fought for his daughter, and he also puts her first in everything he does. He’s living proof that asking for help with mental health is a good thing and we are so glad Abdul’s here to share his story with us. 💙
Use the player above to listen to Dadvengers Podcast Episode 10
Episode Time Stamps
2:13 – “My dad is one of 17…!” – Abdul grew up in a big blended family that made him want to be a dad one day.
6:39 – “I wasn’t ready… I was pi**ed.” – Abdul’s reaction to finding out he was going to be a dad.
12:15 – “My dad told me ‘what makes you think you can leave your child’… he was right”. – The conversation with Abdul’s father that made him realise he had to step up.
18:19 – “It went from ‘it might be a chest infection’ to ‘she needs an emergency caesarian’.” – His daughter’s mum was the first pregnant woman in the UK to be diagnosed with Covid-19.
21:44 – “I wasn’t allowed in because of corona”. – Abdul’s daughter was born five weeks early.
23:47 – “I was a zombie”– Abdul on grieving for his daughter’s mother and being a new dad.
26:56 – “Social services said ‘we can’t let the child go home with you’ We took it to court”. – Abdul fight for custody of his own daughter.
37:45 – “A mum wouldn’t have gone through that”. – The unfairness of the family court system for dads.
41:21 – “I felt like I could do more for her welfare – so I did”. – What pushed Abdul onto fight for custody of his daughter.
44:51 – “I was in the deepest state of depression… and I have a screaming baby” – Abdul was adjusting to single parenting while battling his mental health.
48:37 – “If you don’t go out and provide your child won’t eat, that was my lightbulb moment”. – Abdul had a new business idea to provide for his child.
56:00 – “Put your pride to the side and talk to someone”. – Abdul sought help for his mental health.
57:34 – “It’s a beautiful name and it just makes sense” – Abdul shares his daughter’s name.
58:55 – Abdul’s dad superpower.
Also on Dadvengers…
If you enjoyed this episode of the Dadvengers Podcast don’t forget to check out some of the others. We have dads from all sorts of backgrounds and industries talking about their journey’s through fatherhood. And more are being added all the time.
Whether you are male, female, and parent or a parenting professional there’s lots to be learned by listening to men tell their stories. We also have a comments box below if you’d like to leave your thoughts.
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Another awesome guest that will hopefully inspire others to keep on learning as we parent. There is no one size fits all formula to being a dad we all have to adapt to whatever life throws at us.
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