Dadvengers Podcast Episode 24 – Ben Anderson
***Trigger Warning*** – In this episode we will be discussing topics that may be triggering for some listeners, namely premature birth and baby loss. If you are affected by any of the subjects in this episode you can find support here.
It’s the Dadvengers Podcast Episode 24 – Ben Anderson! This week’s guest is a businessman, a huge name in the online parenting world, and a brilliant hands on dad. He also runs a successful business with his wife Sophie, and together they have 5 children.
Ben learnt a lot from his own childhood. Particularly from his dad who worked his business around his family. He was also a hands on father, doing school runs and supporting his kids. Now Ben manages his business and work around his five children. This was difficult through the lockdowns, and learning to work from home with the kids was a big change for the family.
Ben also shares a lot of his family life on his hugely popular Instagram TheDiaryOfADad. One part of Ben’s parenting journey he chose to share was their experience of baby loss. After the birth of their third child, Ben’s wife fell pregnant with twins and everything seemed to be going well. Unfortunately, at 21 weeks Sophie went into early labour, and was admitted to hospital. Sadly their twins were born at 22 weeks and did not survive.
This had a huge impact on Ben as a father, and grief affected him in ways he couldn’t have imagined. This also impacted how Ben felt when Sophie fell pregnant with their next child. Ben continued to share this online, and as a result received an outpouring of support from the community he’d built which helped him through this difficult time.
We are so grateful to Ben for joining us and sharing his experiences. Above all, we are certain that by him sharing his story it will help more dads going through similar situations.
Use the player above to listen to Dadvengers Podcast Episode 10
Episode Time Stamps
3:51 – “It became a challenge when we were back to work with multiple children!” – Ben tell us about his work and the impacts of the lockdowns.
7:22 – “Absolutely not… I business was the priority… then we fell pregnant!” – Was having a large family in Ben’s plans?
9:32 – “Nothing can prepare you for the act of changing a nappy for the first time!”. – Adjusting to being a dad and the times Ben felt overwhelmed by new fatherhood.
12:28 – “My early memories are that my dad would be there… he was very hands-on and we had that connection” – Ben’s relationship with his own father.
17:38 – “It is 2022 and we are still having this conversation!”. Approaching issues around race and unconscious bias with his children.
29:00 – “My family was the grounding force for me” – Why Ben decided to have a large family, and how having children changed his focus.
35:51 – “I remember a turning point at 21 weeks… she was in labour… I was hanging onto hope” – Ben talks about his experience of twin pregnancy.
43:12 – “I want people to know what we’re going through… the love and support was just insane, I saw social media at it’s very best” – Why Ben decided to share the experience in real time on Instagram.
46:20 – “Once you’ve gone through that loss those things are always going to be there in your head.” – The impact of losing his children at 22 weeks, and the effect on other pregnancies.
51:30 – “Everyone grieves differently” Ben on experiencing grief, and how he managed this while parenting their three other children.
1:01:28 – Ben tells us about the support from other dads who have experienced baby loss, using his experience to support other dads in the same situation and reminds us why you can’t always believe what you see on social media.
01:10:40 – We ask your questions and learn Ben’s Parenting Superpower.
Also on Dadvengers…
If you enjoyed this episode of the Dadvengers Podcast don’t forget to check out some of the others. We have dads from all sorts of backgrounds and industries talking about their journey’s through fatherhood. And more are being added all the time.
Whether you are male, female, and parent or a parenting professional there’s lots to be learned by listening to men tell their stories. We also have a comments box below if you’d like to leave your thoughts.
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Another awesome guest that will hopefully inspire others to keep on learning as we parent. There is no one size fits all formula to being a dad we all have to adapt to whatever life throws at us.
If you want to hear more Dadvengers Podcast episodes the easiest way is to subscribe via your usual podcast provider. In addition, you can always check back here on the website where all episodes are listed on the Podcast page.