Last week it was the 2 year anniversary of George Floyd’s murder. We feel it is so important to keep talking about George Floyd and keep working to raise awareness, make changes and educate ourselves and others on race.
In this week's Dad Chats we spoke about whether we feel anything has changed in the last 2 years in regards to Race and Racism. Are people still talking about what happened to George Floyd, and working to make change? Is race, racism and diversity a topic of discussion in your household? What more can we do to educate, and make change? This is a massive topic, and one that we know we can't cover all of in one chat - and you know we will come back to it again...
This dad chat was really enlightening. Thanks to @iam_papab and @markgs21 for coming up to speak on the subject and everyone who joined in on the comments. Let's keep the conversation going.
This is subject close to our hearts here at Dadvengers, and we have lots of content across the site about this important topic.
Check out just some of these great Dad Chats, blogs and podcast episodes that talk about race:
Dad Chats Live - This week we talked with Elliott Rae from @mff about their new book DAD. A collection of 20 stories of fatherhood from 20 real dads who are living it every day. It’s a much needed book that will hopefully help to change the narrative for modern day fathers.
Elliott chatted to us about how the DAD book came about - the stories he heard from the different dads, and how he crowdfunded the project after it was turned down. We also talk about Elliott's experience of becoming a father, and how his daughter was unwell after her birth. This led Elliott to suffer PTSD, and he realised there wasn't enough support for dads to talk about their experiences.
Elliott then created MFF - Music, Football, Fatherhood, which started as a blog, and has grown into a support network for dads.
Another week with a brilliant Friday night chat!
This important book is groundbreaking. It is bringing together a group of men to speak openly about their challenges and successes in parenting. But getting it published wasn't easy. Elliott was turned down by different publishing houses. And in the end set about to raise the funds to self publish.
Read more about Elliott and what he had to do to make this book a reality in the post Everything You Need to Know About the ‘DAD’ Book
Plus Elliott also joined us on the Dadvengers Podcast where he talked about growing up in London with his parents who had emigrated from the Caribbean. You'll hear how his how his dad was a strict parent, but he was also fair and supportive! Elliott also opened up about the difficult birth of his daughter and first few months of his daughters life. From being in hospital to a life threatening allergic reaction at just a few months old. All this had a massive impact on Elliott’s parenting journey, and also led to his starting the Music Football Fatherhood.
Dad Chats Live. This week we revisit the George Floyd murder one year on.
In the weeks and months after George Floyd's murder, everyone was talking about racial equality and the Black Lives Matter movement. One year on - we talked about whether anything has actually changed? Has the conversation carried on after the initial media focus? What has changed?
We are joined by some regular Dadvengers, and some new members, to talk about the legacy of George Floyd. We chat about what we learnt about combating racism, and whether we are doing enough to be good allies. Then, we talk about the changes organisations and governments have, or haven't made, and what we think they should do.
Lastly, we shared the best books, films and TV shows to watch to learn about racism, including great books for our children. Use the links below to catch up on this brilliant Friday night Dad Chat.
1. One year on from the murder of George Floyd, how much have you learnt about what we need to do to combat racism and do you think you are doing enough?
2. What things (if any) do you think organisations and governments have done better in the year since the protests last year?
3. Tell us about the films and TV shows that you've seen since we gave you a list of things to watch to help educate yourself about racism.
Talking to our children about race issues can be tricky, but Last year, Nigel wrote a great blog called How To Talk To Children About #BlackLivesMatter. This is a great resource with helpful advice for talking to our kids about this important topic. We highly recommend you take a look.
If you haven't heard, we also have a fantastic Podcast which is hosted by Nigel, and every week he talks to a different guest about their parenting journey. We have some great guests who talk about racism in their stories. These are from John Lashley (Brooklyn Brownie Company), Elliott Rae, Amos Hurst and Nihal Arthanayake - check them out!
Enjoyed this? Click here for more Dad Chats!
On the 25th of May 2020 George Floyd was killed by a police officer in broad daylight. Another senseless murder of a member of the black community, it sparked a chain of events that caused people to take notice. It caused people to think about the racism black people have suffered. It has added fuel to the Black Lives Matter movement and raised it's worldwide profile. Now more than ever it feels like there has been a shift in consciousness, like people both black and white people have had enough of the systemic racism that poisons our lives. This is why it is so important for us to talk to children about #Blacklivesmatter. If we are going to make things better it starts with educating both ourselves and our children.
In addition to writing this post I also spoke about this topic on the BBC Bitesized Primary Parents Survival Guide Podcast. Here is a 30sec clip from the show, and thank you to the Bitesized team and Eli Sessions for having me on the show.
Click here to listen to the full Podcast - How to talk to your children about Black Lives Matter
There is no point trying to broach a subject with your children that you know little about . If you want to be able to answer their questions and have an insightful conversation with them, you need to know what you’re talking about. Throughout this blog piece there are one or two resources to help with this but stay curious and keep exploring. There is so much out there.
Whether you realise it or not, being a white person grants that person certain rights that are not extended to black people. Tackling racism is also about challenging the stereotypes of white privilege which we see everyday. These stereotypes are linked to institutional or systematic racism and changing them will be pivotal in changing attitudes as a whole. If you are white this is one of the hardest parts of racism to grasp and come to terms with. Partly because white or black we’ve had so many years of accepting white privilege as the norm. So when you talk to children about #blacklivesmatter it’s important to remember to include this side of things.
We live in a diverse world with people of different races and cultures. We need to demonstrate and make our children aware of these from an early age. The more they see and know about diversity and race the more they will understand it. A really good way way to start this is through reading. We read books to our children from a very young age and with any luck they carry on reading into adulthood. Here are a list of books compiled by Kidadl that tackle diversity, race and the issues surrounding racism. Read some for your children, suggest titles they can read themselves and be prepared for the conversations they start.
Racism can be a very difficult topic to discuss, especially when looking at the uglier side of it. Topics like hate, cruelty and the violence can be shocking and scary for adults let alone children. Be mindful and sensitive to this and discuss as age appropriately as you can. We must realise that some topics will need to be revisited as our kids become more mature and gain experience. There is no need to frighten them unnecessarily. But this is also not a reason to not have difficult conversations.
It’s one of the fundamentals of life but it doesn’t hurt to reiterate this when it comes to race. We need to educate our kids to treat others in the same way we would like to be treated regardless of race, religion colour or creed. Children are not born racist they learn racist behaviour from the people around them. If we can eradicate this we are half way to eradicating racism.
This point is taken from our How to be a good Dad post? Children constantly look to their parents to see the way they should behave. Even when you think they are not paying attention, they are. When dealing with a subject as sensitive as racism you must try to behave in a way you would like them to behave. If we can’t demonstrate anti-racism as parents how can we expect our children to?
As a parent educating themselves about racism we are lucky to have some incredible films and TV shows that I regard as essential viewing. They cover different times, different subjects, different aspects, and different problems. I have included this basic list. Watch as many as you can, absorb them, imagine the atrocities were committed against you. Hopefully it will drive you to fight against racism and talk to children about #BlacklivesMatter.
It’s important that we hear from those of you out there living it. Have you got black or multiracial children? Have you’re kids experienced racism? What other resources can help with this topic?
Please leave your comments in the section below and share this post and other Dadvengers Posts with other dads and parents. The more the merrier. And remember, Mums, Grandparents, Carers, Parenting Professionals you are an integral part of this. We can’t improve things for dads and help make changes without you. So please help, even if it’s just sharing a post or making a suggestion.
Look forward to hearing from you
Dadvengers
